While we were in the Dominican Republic, Jo accidentally got addicted to ABC’s The Bachelorette. Naturally, I’ve been obliged to watch every episode since.

"She's so amazing and beautiful, I love her with all my heart. Do I wish we could spend more one-on-one time together? Absolutely!"

We’ve just finished watching an episode (it comes out Monday nights in America, so thank christ for SurfTheChannel.com), but to spice it up a bit we came up with the following drinking game:

Drink whenever any of the following phrases are mentioned:

Alone time/One-on-one time

All the blokes on the program will say this at least once each

Heart (as a metaphor)

This phrase is widerife among everyone. Hearts beating fast, etc, don’t count.

Absolutely (instead of “yes”, not as a modifier)

Because in America, “Yes” isn’t extreme enough.

[Girl's name] looks/is beautiful/amazing

Again, all the blokes will say something this obvious each episode.

Chemistry/connection

This is a new addition (09/06/2010), designed to replace some of the other rules as the series progresses and the format changes. This phrase is prolific, so hardcore drinkers only, please.

I know there’s only four rules, but it’s on for two whole hours (25% of which is adverts for incredibly cheap fast food – we also saw an amazing offer to buy six gallons of milk and get a seventh free – who the fuck is buying this much milk?! Anyway…) and the amount of repetition and stating the obvious is truly mind blowing.

Don’t forget, I still want suggestions for my list of drugs blogs!

My last two posts have been a bit hard going, so here’s a little something to lighten the mood:

Ok, so now you’re addicted Shaun The Sheep instead of mephedrone.

Although Shaun The Sheep provides me with a cheap, 10 minute euphoria, at least it’s off the ACMD’s radar… for now! Just make sure you only tell your responsible friends about this so our nation’s kids don’t start getting hold of it. That said, you may want to start stockpiling the episodes on DVD before the inevitable.

Also, in case you’re wondering what a couple in their 20′s are doing watching kid’s telly, FUCK YOU, that’s what!