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A Mushroomy Weekend

By John Clarke

Check out my new SupaFly Agaric incense burner! Quite pos­sibly the most tack­i­est piece of crap ever made, but at only £6.50, can you really com­plain? My girl­friend and I found this won­der­ful item at Birmingham’s German Christ­mas Market, where ample hot dogs and beer in expens­ive looking glasses divert your atten­tion away from the fact that everything is mass pro­duced in Nepal. Basic­ally, the big mush­room at the back lifts off, reveal­ing a metal plate upon which you place a burning incense cone. Pop the mush­room back on and smoke billows from his chimney. That’s right, his chimney. Not only does this anthro­po­morph­ised Amanita mus­caria spe­ci­men possess a face com­plete with mous­tache, he also appears to be a dwell­ing of some descrip­tion, equipped with a chimney and a door. What might live in there, I have no idea. Regard­less, this was almost the best pur­chase ever, second only to the £3 spent on deep fried cheese minutes before.

Inspired by this epic work of art, I decided to get A​-Mus​caria​.com back online after a few weeks of down time. This is a small exper­i­ment of mine I set up to compete with myself. The ground fly agaric and soma spliffs on there are the same as those listed on Coffeesh0p, just priced slightly dif­fer­ently. There’s a couple of pretty inter­est­ing art­icles on there too about fly agaric basics and history — did you know the laypeople of eastern Siberia would consume their shaman’s piss for it’s psy­cho­act­ive con­stitu­ents? You do now!

Hope­fully, I’ll have some whole amanita mus­caria caps on Coffeesh0p soon. The ground caps still do the trick, they just don’t look any­where near as cool….

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